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MONTHLY FEATURE
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Living in Their World
For Those Caring
for Those with Dementia, Education, Understanding Are Keys
BY GEORGE O’BRIEN
eth Cardillo calls them ‘fiblets.’
These are things that are said to someone with
dementia that ... well, do not represent the whole truth, or even a portion of it, at least to the person making that statement.
But to that person suffering from Alzheimer’s or one of the many other forms of dementia, it is the truth as they see it in their world. “It’s not a lie,” she said of these fiblets. “It’s an OK thing to
tell people with memory issues.”
She offered up an example.
“Let’s say someone’s husband has been dead for 20 years; she
might say, ‘I’m not going out shopping, I’m waiting for my hus- band to get home,’” noted Cardillo. “A fiblet would be ... ‘oh, he just called; his tooth is hurting him and he’s going to see a dentist. Why don’t you and I go out for a ride and go to the grocery store?’”
“You’re going to tell someone that their husband died over and over again, every day?” she went on, asking that question rhetori- cally before answering it poignantly. “I mean, why would I want to do that? It’s cruel.”
Indeed, and fiblets are a good example of how those caring for and simply around individuals with dementia regularly should try to live in their world, rather than constantly try to pull them into the ‘real’ world. It’s also an example of the kind of work that Cardi-
BusinessWest
MONTHLY FEATURE
APRIL 24, 2023 21
Beth Cardillo