Parents
The Wealth Technology Group
By: Gary F. Thomas, JD, LLM, CLU, ChFC, AIF, CDFA
Earlier this year I received a call from “Jen”, a concerned client. She had just learned from her older brother that her widowed, elderly mother, who lives in Rhode Island, had fallen a couple of days before and had been admitted to the hospital with broken ribs and several fractures. Even though Jen was in the regular habit of calling her mother once or twice a week, the fall occurred shortly after their last conversation and was a shock.
Jen immediately dropped what she was doing and drove to the hospital. While visiting she perceived that her mother was suffering from more than the fractures, but was also somewhat disoriented, which Jen assumed was because of medications that were administered to alleviate pain.
When asked why she was not notified of the fall immediately she was told that mother and her brother who lived nearby just “didn’t want to worry her”. Of course Jen was worried, not only about her mother’s health but also about her mother’s finances, and whether any plan was in place to prepare for the unexpected. All along she had assumed that her brother, who was a retired comptroller, had everything under control.
When Jen questioned her brother, he said that even though he had dealt with finances for his entire life, he was uncomfortable talking to Mom about money, because it was too close to home. He wasn’t sure what planning their mother had done, whether or not she had even the most basic legal documents, and if so where they were located.
“They learned that their mother, who had lost her husband more than twenty years earlier, had never updated the documents after their father’s death.”
Unfortunately, they were forced to have the difficult conversation about money with their mother while she was still in the hospital, admittedly, not an ideal time. They learned that their mother, who had lost her husband more than twenty years earlier, had never updated the documents after their father’s death. Mom said that the lawyer who had prepared them had retired long ago, and she wasn’t sure where the originals were. More than that, she was not quite certain of her banking and financial accounts because the names of the institutions had changed so many times over the years, and she found it difficult to keep track of what she owned. Mom said she had just been assuming that, because of her son’s financial background “he would take care of things” should any health or financial issues arise.
Fortunately since her accident, Mom has returned home and appointments were made for the whole family to meet with a local attorney to complete some basic estate and elder law planning. Now, both Jen and her brother have located Mom’s insurance policies, financial accounts, and credit cards, and keep track of accounts monthly. They have updated the beneficiaries on life insurance and retirement accounts, which are now set up to avoid probate. For the first time, they have a clear picture of their mother’s assets, income and expenses.
Unfortunately, many incidents like this don’t quite turn out as well. Lack of planning and lack of time can cause a financial disaster. Often costly financial decisions are made in the heat of the moment and without full knowledge of the resources available, tax consequences, or the affect of the parent’s ongoing needs.
Our advice: Broach the conversation about money after you have completed your own estate and financial plan, then share with your parents what you have done, which may make it easier to begin the conversation.
Gary F. Thomas
JD, LLM, CLU, ChFC, AIF, CDFA
“Because it’s not what you make … it’s what you keep!”
Gary is the President of The Wealth Technology Group, with offices in Pittsfield and Westfield. His company serves over a thousand individuals and businesses in Massachusetts, Connecticut, and across the country, helping them reduce taxes, diversify their portfolios, and keep more of what they have.
Gary is a native of Pittsfield and is a graduate of the Massachusetts College of Liberal Arts and Western New England University Law School. He is a member of the Massachusetts Bar and holds the prestigious Master of Laws in Taxation degree from Boston University Law School. Gary is a Chartered Life Underwriter and a Chartered Financial Consultant. He is also certified as an Accredited Investment Fiduciary, having met the ethical and education standards of a prestigious network of forward-looking investment professionals dedicated to advancing fiduciary responsibility.
Gary has conducted courses on retirement planning, financial management, and estate planning at General Dynamics Corporation, Tubed Products, the Massachusetts Nurse’s Association, Plumbers and Pipefitters Locals 4 and 104, Westfield State University, Berkshire Community College and the Massachusetts College of Liberal Arts, and has lectured financial planning and insurance professionals throughout the U.S. and internationally on best practices and customer service. He specializes in education about safe money management and the maximization of pension and Social Security benefits, so that his clients enjoy a stress-free retirement.
Gary is a member of the Massachusetts Bar Association, the Financial Planning Association, the National Association of Insurance and Financial Advisors, and the International Association of Financial Planners; he sits on the Board of Directors of the MCLA Foundation. Last year, Gary was honored to be appointed a member of the Board of Trustees for Western New England University. He also underwrites programming for WHMP, Channel 57, and is a member of the Westfield Chamber of Commerce and the Better Business Bureau. He was chosen Outstanding Philanthropist of the Year for 2013 by the Western Mass Association of Fundraising Professionals.
Gary is a presence on local media and is sometimes called upon to comment on financial news. Every few weeks Gary also has some fun talking about financial topics with Bax & O’Brien on Rock102. His programs are available on the station websites, and are podcast on iTunes and at www.wealthtechnology.com. He has appeared nationally on Fox Business News, and has been quoted on the Forbes and CNN Money websites.
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